It's Official: Ocho Cinco

Chad Javon Johnson is now legally, "Chad Javon Ocho Cinco." Yes, the stunt-happy, wide receiver for the Cincinnati Bengals legally changed his last name to Ocho Cinco.

If that's not awesome, fun, and entertaining, I don't know what is.

A Freudian Slip?

Hilariousness

Nice attempt at a pathetic revision.

In all fairness, I'm sure the writer of the headline didn't mean anything racist by it. Unfortunately he (or she) probably lost the job and will soon be living in a cardboard box.....

Uhmmmm, What?!

I awoke this morning to a g-chat message from Zach, talking about McCain's VP choice. I was confused. Low and behold, McCain had in fact picked his running mate.....

The Pros for McCain - it's hard for Obama to attack Palin too much without hurting his chances with female voters on the fence. Appeals to Hillary supporters who are on the fence (and are bitter Hillary didn't get the nomination....)

The Cons for McCain - this women is hardly qualified to be VP, she is already being investigated for ethics, and she pretty much embodies everything McCain claims Obama is: a politician with minimal experience.....

I'd write more, but I don't feel like reading up to get all of the facts, and then re-typing them on here. It's an interesting election. I'm sure (MC) Karl Rove has something up his dirty sleeve. Let's hope it doesn't work. This is just bad news bears all day.

Life as a Cookie Monster

There are all kinds of monsters around me.

Snack Monsters: those who constantly snack. I have photos on my phone of the trail left behind a snack monster. This includes: (a) an open pantry door, (b) a closet full of snackery goodness, and (c) wrappers (not the singing kind) strewn about.

Sleep Monsters: those who sleep excessively. Although the older I've gotten, the more I value sleep.

Cookie Monsters: those who consume gross amounts of cookies in a short period of time. Yesterday, I became a cookie monster (no, not the cookie monster....just A cookie monster)

The court coordinator was busy scarfing down some cookies and walked by the bullpen (where all the clerks sit at). I was alone, as no one was coming into work that day, and so she quickly did an about-face and ran and got a bag of homemade cookies. She dropped them on the desk and instructed me to have some. Chewy, buttery, and ohhhhhh sooooooooo good chocolate chip cookies. She commented that she had eaten about 4 or 5 in just a span of minutes.

"geez," I thought, "get a grip...." Then I had one....then I had two. In the span of a minute and a half, I consumed 4 cookies.....and then I understood the problem....these were some AWESOME cookies. I kept eating them. Another minute passed and I figured out that I needed to stop. I zipped up the bag and walked in her office. "You're trying to make me fat, aren't you!? It's not going to work. You take these cookies back, right now." I sat them on top of a book shelf and turned around.

Another five minutes passed, and she walked out, exclaiming, :"I feel nauseous...I ate too many cookies." Then she told the balif that it was me who ate all the cookies.

Moral of the story? Being a cookie monster will: a) cause you to lie to others about who consumed the cookies, and b) give you a tummy ache.

This was quite possibly the dumbest post in a while...my apologies. And thanks Brooke, for the photo. COOOOOOOOOOOKIES.

Cuban + Taekwando = AWESOME [Lifetime Ban]

did that just happen? Yes.

Okay, so my friends came over on Saturday and I think it was Julio who was trying to explain a referee getting kicked in the face during an Olympic Taekwondo match. Unfortunately (and according to my memory) he did it no justice. Sorry Julio, but Angel Matos WENT INSANE. According to the Australian commentator, he had a "brain explosion" causing him to kick the ref in the face. Oh and he punched some other blue-jacketed Olympic officials. NOTHING SHORT OF AWESOMENESS.

Not to mention the lifetime ban that dude got for doing this. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE WATCH THIS VIDEO BEFORE IT GETS TAKEN DOWN

GOOOOOOOOOOOLD

I am absolutely thrilled that the US went undefeated and killed it in the gold medal game. We hosted a small get together last night, and it ended up being about 7-10 of us who stayed up to watch the game at 1:30 am. It was exciting. I lost my voice chanting, USA, USA, USA, USA, and then abruptly stopping.

D-Wade KILLED IT. Kobe finally showed up and did his thang BIG TIME. Hitting some majorly clutch shots. The intensity was so thick in the house that Mani and I even argued about Lebron vs. Kobe. I have no idea why. I think my point was that Lebron and Wade have been absolutely solid all throughout the games, whereas Kobe has been jacking and not really being the offensive force he normally is. If you know me, you know that rarely will I ever lobby for Lebron. But he has been an absolute beast throughout the games. (14pts, 7 rebs in the gold medal game).

Highlight though? Rudy Fernandez crowning Dwight Howard. This never should have happened. Due to copyright laws, you guys get the jpeg version of it. NASTINESS. Portland is gonna be a monster with him, Bayless, Roy, Blake.....nuts.


Also, Juan Carlos Navarro was killing it for Spain. Dude came over for a year, but jetted back to Spain or wherever because he likes it there more. Couldn't argue with that. Plus his buddy Pau left for "greener" pastures, stranding Navarro in Memphis. And on another note, Marc Gasol (a Grizzlie because of the Pau to LA trade) looks like a lunatic.